Aug 31, 2009

Nothing Happens in August*

*except a lot of awful, confusing things.

So earlier this month, my favorite Slate contributor, Anne Applebaum, wrote an article, "Four global crises that could ruin your vacation." The short version: August is well-known as a slow news month always. However, horrible things tend to happen in August: the start of World War I, Iraq's invasion of Kuwait...

Well it got me thinking, and surpise surprise, August is a rather busy month for Eternal Remont. And I thought I'd take a minute and reflect on the last 3 Augusts ER has covered.

2007: Canada and Stephen Colbert freak out when Russia claims the Arctic by taking a submarine into international waters and placing a Russian flag on the sea floor. Meanwhile back on dry land, a Russian woman sets her ex-husband's genitals on fire. That was a weird and zany August.

2008: Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn passed away right before the Russians and Georgians started a war. However, the world was too busy marveling at Michael Phelps and wondering just how old those little Chinese gymnasts were (I still can't believe those medals haven't been stripped). Also, Ukraine's autonomy was once again put into question.

And this year, 2009: The North Caucasus suffers a "relapse." But to keep us in better spirits, we also enjoyed a new tale from the sea: Ice Pirates.

Dear Eurasia, for August 2010 I encourage more zany arctic exploits and much less trouble in the Caucasus. Deal?


Pirates(and)Diplomats said...

Will we ever run out of content?

How could we?

Viola said...

It cannot succeed as a matter of fact, that's what I suppose.