Whatever You Can Do

Putin will make you do better.

That's the message we're hearing from Prime Minister Vladimir Putin more and more often these days. Putin has gone on a cross-country rampage, making it clear that people are just not up to his standards.

At a time when no one seems capable of making decisions, Putin is stepping in. First he throws a pen at oligarch Oleg Deripaska and forces him to sign an agreement to buy raw materials to reopen a Pikalyovo cement factory. "Do better, or we'll do it without you," he told Deripaska. Barely a week later, he's told celebrated painter Ilya Glazunov that the sword in his work Prince Oleg with Igor would only be good for slicing sausages. “I don’t miss a single detail,” Putin told Glazunov.

What do Russian art and oligarchs have in common? Come to think of it, Putin really is the best qualified person to give advice on both subjects. His first painting sold for a whopping 37 million rubles last year, setting a new record sale price. He's also squirreled away something away for a rainy day himself..::cough:: forty billion ::cough:: and might himself be associated with a few questionable business endeavors. Look out Dima, we know what else he's good at...