Sep 30, 2008

When Pirates Attack! (Part Trois)

Now we know the real victims in this pirate business: Latvian and Lithuanian national identity. Take it away WashPost:

"The crew members [of the hijacked freighter] number 17 Ukranians, three Russians, and one person described as either Latvian or Lithuanian."

To be fair, everyone knows that all Latvians and Lithuanians look the same, speak the same language, share the same football team, and come from basically the same country. Hell, even the Czechs couldn't tell the difference when they played either the Latvians or Lithuanians earlier this year.

This aggression towards Latvian and Lithuanian identity must end.

As a sign of solidarity with our much-abused Balitc friends, Eternal Remont will no longer distinguish between Canadians and Americans, as in Canadian President George Bush, or American country music sensation Shania Twain. (Who is really a Canadian, ha!)

[Thanks Ern, mistress of country music.]

15 comments:

Ern said...

First of all isn't it Shania?

Second, I welcome the the opportunity to confuse Canadians with Americans and vice versa (despite previous suggestions to start a war with Canada, which I might have made in a certain blog entry about the dispute over territory in the Arctic.)

Pirates(and)Diplomats said...

That's how they spell it in Canada, you jingoist.

Jaybird said...

Wait, one country has a Lithuanian-American president, and the other had a Canadian-Latvian president. Or was is American-Canadian and Latvian-Lithuanian? Or Lithuanian-Canadian? ARRRGH! Damn You Pirates!

Pirates(and)Diplomats said...

Exactly!

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