Jan 13, 2009

Is Burkina Faso to Blame? Only Medvedev Knows


As the gas dispute disintegrated into absolute hilarity, Gazprom Deputy Chief Executive Alexander Medvedev figured this was the perfect time to air a wild conspiracy theory. (Is there ever a bad time?)

"One gets the impression that this whole musical which is happening in Ukraine is being conducted by a completely different country," Medvedev said. He declined to name the specific country, but we’re going to assume he intended to finger Burkina Faso and not the United States.

Meanwhile, Russia has rebooted the crisis since the first run-through didn’t go according to plan. At precisely 7:30 GMT this morning, Gazprom resumed deliveries through Ukraine. However, the Ukrainians report that Russia sent the gas on a magical mystery tour of obscure pipelines, and at very low pressure. The next step is to blame Ukraine for stealing the gas, again. We'll know if its working if we don't see any more of Gerhard Schröder.

All of this is a problem for Viktor Yanukovych, who worries about his lack of press in the dispute and has called for Yushchenko's impeachment. For everyone keeping score at home, this would be the political equivalent of carpet bombing a city after it had been hit by an earthquake.

Hot tea, anyone? We’d offer you some but the gas is out.

4 comments:

Ern said...

Hahahahaha! I love that Yanukovych is upset he isn't getting press. Poor guy, without a sweet braid or facial scars from Russia-instigated poisonings, you're not worth interviewing in Ukraine.

Pirates(and)Diplomats said...

Yeah, a hearty scowl doesn't go as far as it used to these days.

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www.tuweb.biz said...

There's no doubt, the guy is completely right.